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They’re Back and She’s Fired Up!

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Totally Married Podcast


Elizabeth and Andy explain the great and the not so great of what caused their absence last week, and then Elizabeth discovers that her rage is being misdirected at her sweet, well meaning husband! Before entering QUITE a political pocket, they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to dodge social events with a friend’s ex, whether or not to tell another woman that her now boyfriend cheated on you with her, if one is supposed to scrub their social media of an ex’s presence after a breakfup, and if it’s kosher to move other people’s laundry from the dryer when you’re waiting your turn? Enjoy!


Leah says:

Hi Elizabeth & Andy! Another great podcast that had me laughing all the way through! I just wanted to say that I don’t think you need to be worried about the Dodd Frank changes. I work at a small local bank in Maine, and Dodd Frank put a lot of restrictions on banks like us, making it harder to compete with the big banks. Most small banks like us had nothing to do with the housing crisis, I know my bank is very careful with the loans we lend out because giving out bad loans would just backfire on us and we wouldn’t survive. Still we were punished for the housing crisis and forced to comply with regulations that suppress growth and are not as significant to big banks. I understand your concern- but I wanted to highlight that there some legitimate reasons to make changes to Dodd Frank.

Apia says:

I laughed a few times really loud listening to this episode.
Elisabeth on fire and Andy chill and happy.
Best part: ” people will say you don’t deserve me!”
” I….. don’t…. deserve….. you? Not…..otherwise…..? “

J says:

As always, HILARIOUS podcast… love listening to you two laugh at each other. In commenter Leah’s vein I wanted to clarify that the House healthcare bill as it was passed is NOT what the Senate is working off of. The Senate essentially scrapped that bill (for obvious reasons among which is the vote margin in the Senate is much tighter –they can only afford to lose 2 republican votes in order for the bill to pass– and the House bill as it is written would NEVER pass) and are starting completely over. Who knows what they will propose/come up with but it doesn’t seem likely they’ll be able to come up with a magic bill that all but 2 republican Senators can agree on anytime soon (and then… THAT bill has to get passed again in the House). I, a democrat, like you Elizabeth, wanted to pass that on to hopefully relieve just a tiny bit of anxiety.

I also HIGHLY recommend the NPR Politics Podcast as it is fairly bipartisan and VERY informational. I know more about politics than I ever wanted to have to learn… but some of my crazy anxiety has been alleviated by feeling a little bit more in the know (also I feel much more prepared to have discussions with my republican friends).

Writer-Inner says:

I want to believe this, but considering the GOP is more deadset on just being able to say they killed obamacare than necessarily passing something that fits perfectly into their ideology, and considering that Mitch Mcconnell is actually more competent in his job than Paul Ryan, I don’t believe that Republicans will dissent even from an awful bill. I don’t believe a couple of Republicans, even moderate ones, want to stand in the way of defeating Obamacare. Even though they’re not using the House bill which would take insurance away from 20+ million, their bill is slated to take it away from 15ish million people (awaiting the CBO score of course). That’s still a number that is cruel, unforgivable, and evil in my eyes.

J says:

Just curious… where have you read information on what actually is in the Senate healthcare bill? The republicans have been drafting this in total secrecy while the rest of the world focuses on Comey/Russia. Which is problematic for innumerable reasons.

I’d be very interested to read any information you have.

Writer-Inner says:

@ J – the operative word here “read” actually doesn’t apply…I follow several political podcasts that have congressmen & women and other relevant political people on as guests who have quoted certain pieces of information which they’ve gleaned, I’m assuming, just from being in the thick of it. Granted I know this is harder to objectively fact-check because there’s an obvious in crowd dynamic.

BUT: I highly recommend Pod Save America and Pod Save the People, both available on your regular podcast app and streaming in a variety of places. Highly informative, hosted by extremely accomplished former political organizers, staffers, etc. Excellent guests. Incredibly informative and digestible. PSA in particular has segments on the health care bill’s status virtually every week, sometimes twice.

Catherine says:

I haven’t listened to the whole podcast yet but I have to say I totally relate to you freaking out over croup. My son is the same age as Otis. When he was 10months all the sudden he was having trouble breathing (came on middle of night out of nowhere). He also has food allergies and probably asthma too. The whole time on our way to the hospital I was Crying telling my husband he can’t breath and I need to take him out of the car seat (we were on the interstate, great parenting right there lol). My husband was yelling at me not to. . I was hysterical and so scared. Turned out to be croup and we spent a night in hospital with breathing treatments. I don’t blame you for doing Epi pen! We have one too but I have thankfully never used it. Croup is apparently notorious for coming on quickly in middle of the night. I’m glad Otis man is doing better. Now on to listen to the rest of the episode lol!

Julie says:

I’ve listened to the last few podcasts as a group, and I think it was the vasectomy one (or maybe the one right before that) where you let people know you’d be podcasting until you were 70. I have never written a “fan” letter, but you seem a little bummed that listenership is down or that you only got a few comments telling you to keep going. KEEP GOING. I have binged all of the Totally Mommys (even though I don’t have any kids, and how is Vanessa?) and all of the Totally Marrieds and the episodes constantly brighten my day. I love your interaction as a couple, I totally agree with you on all the political pockets, and I admire that you keep on making progress with your creative goals (I’m a boring old lawyer). You’re only a year or two younger than me, so I think if you go until 70, I can find alternate sources of entertainment by the time I’m 72. Please know there are people out here who are quiet but appreciative.

Andrea says:

I just want to say I love Elizabeth’s political pockets. I’m angry as FUUUUCK too. And I also lash out at my straight white husband sometimes because I look at the way he can compartmentalize and it makes me insane (and if I’m honest a little jealous).

Here’s my take on the AHCA. I would be a lot calmer about it if there were any transparency coming from Senate Republicans. They keep saying that it’s not the same as the House Bill but they won’t say what it IS. Does that make sense?

My grandfather, a veteran of WW2, a single father who cared for his children and later step-children (one of whom had severe developmental delays), he was mostly law-abiding and a tax paying citizen his whole life, in short a very good man, died on Medicaid. And let me tell you it was a grim existence, but thank whoever you thank that he had at least that. I really worry about our poor children and elderly under this new bill. Our safety net for them is shaky at best right now and I’m just afraid even more people will fall through the cracks than already do. And honestly what does that say about us as a society, that we’re willing to let that happen so that we can add a zero or two to the Koch brothers’ net worths? It’s disgusting.

We missed you guys last week! Happy to hear that you’re all well.
Also NEVER apologize for the political pockets. I know you guys don’t want to alienate any listeners, but being a voice for change is so necessary right now.
And personally I LOVE hearing a woman get passionate and work towards positive systemic change.

Lauren S says:

I love this podcast and I am always laughing. I don’t miss those dorm or apartment laundry days. I am curious how you said you used to be a republican and now you are liberal? How does that happen? Though I semi understand as I went from liberal to being more moderate. Anyway keep the podcasts coming.

Sarah says:

I had someone unfriend me who I wanted to unfriend first and I was piiiiiiissed.

Also, some insight about calling Senators and Reps. This is coming from years as a CA legislative staffer, but I think it applies Federally (unless they’ve changed something in how they track calls/emails). Your call won’t be logged unless you are a constituent. So, call your two state Senators and the Representative who reps you, and that’s it. Don’t bother calling out-of-state or out-of-district folks. I know for a lot of people, this makes them feel better, but it is a waste of time. (I am not sure if you were saying to call out-of-state people…I listened to the podcast on Monday and I’m just getting around to commenting), but just to make sure!

Samantha says:

I am so sorry you had to go to the hospital with sick kids, it’s so scary and my heart goes out to you both.
I think you shouldn’t filter any part of your self you are willing to put out there- political pocket or angry feelings. I think most of us listeners appreciate your honesty and it’s so interesting to hear someone’s opinion (even if sometimes it is unlike my own) and views who aren’t being paid to sway one way or the other.
I love listening to the podcast!!

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