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Eternal Power!

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Totally Married Podcast

Episode 303

Elizabeth and Andy discuss their game night memories before sharing some sad news about a pet-friend, and their three year olds’ beautiful interpretation of death. Then they give their unqualified advice to listener questions about how to craft an amazing elopement/cityhall wedding, how to handle mom guilt regarding working as a mom versus working outside the home, and how to set up boundaries with overbearing relatives regarding pregnancy and beyond? Enjoy!


Dash says:

Elopement story for the LW: My husband and I eloped in Chatham, MA a couple years ago. We originally wanted to get married on our vacation in PR (without telling our families) but his wallet was stolen on day 1. Haha! Solidified that we should definitely be together after that disaster but ruined our initial plans. We came back, told the families that we wanted to elope – they weren’t thrilled but we managed – and we did! We hired a JP who also took wedding photos (best combo for elopers); we didn’t need a witness here. We rented a beach house and our friends joined us that evening for a weekend of drinks, grilled food, and lots of laughter. Just be sure to get whatever marriage license requirements completed, and go for it. Congratulations and good luck!

Sarah says:

I had an elopement and it was AMAZING! It was just my husband, our officiant and the photographer. We did a 1 mile hike in the forest to a waterfall where we had our ceremony (it was just outside of Seattle). It was really meaningful to us because we love hiking/camping/outdoors and even did an epic road trip for 4 months around the US seeing several national parks.

My advice for the couple would be to think about trying to incorporate the elopement around whats meaningful to them and their relationship. If they are outdoorsy people, a hike to a beautiful landmark is such a memorable way to get married. Maybe they could head somewhere in their city or road trip to a cool place to have their ceremony. All you need (in most states) is an officiant that is willing to go to said place and DEFINITELY splurge on a photographer that you love. My husband and I didn’t even pick out a date, we found our photographer and just went with the day they were available. Most photographers are willing to travel too.

On the day you officially get married, I would recommend just making that whole day about the two of you. Do whatever makes you happy! Maybe get a hotel for the night and splurge on a fancy restaurant. Leaving town to go to your honeymoon may be too stressful to do on the same day you get married, might be best to leave a day or two after. I think the couple should feel like their elopement was an entire day dedicated to celebrating them and their relationship. Do what feels right to you to dedicate that time to enjoying your new journey and what you think you’ll remember fondly for years to come 🙂 Congratulations!!

Here’s a link to pictures of our wedding..

Lauren S says:

I will have to check out the other mansion you mentioned. As being a St. Louis Native I have heard and been to the Lemp Mansion, but not the other one. Thanks for the suggestion.

MS says:

To the stay-at-home mom whose husband works long and hard to support the family financially:

I have stayed at home with my now 15-month old since she was born and I love it. I’m exactly where I want to be. When my husband works long hours or has a hard week, I step it up on cooking and cleaning as much as I can. I feel the extra work I put in to have dinner ready when he gets home or making sure he has clean and ironed shirts for the week honors the hard work he does.

On the other side of that, his summers are pretty easy at work so I ask him to step it up at home, being more proactive about cleaning and doing some of the cooking, and jumping right in on toddler duty when he walks in the door.

I don’t mean to sound archaic like I’m the little woman doing everything for my man, but for me that’s how I honor his hard work, is to make sure I’m using my energy at home to make things comfortable for all of us.

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