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Broken Scale, Broken Spirit?


My scale broke. Or rather I broke my scale… When I stepped on it. When I stepped on it and it shattered.

Pregnancy, miright?! It’s this weird shape-shifty time that is magical and awful and liberating and scary as fuck. I could write a poorly written book on all my thoughts on pregnancy but let’s just talk about the important part: Weight. (That’s a joke. It’s the least important part. Which I’m just now figuring out.)

Important or not, this is the one aspect of pregnancy that really came to a head for me a few days ago when my glass scale surrendered/cracked into a thousand pieces of my shattered confidence. Just kidding, sorry for being so dramatic… They were actually pieces of my soul. A thousand pieces of my soul lay on my bathroom tile. Or maybe it was tempered glass but it felt like all of my hopes and dreams and my sense of self. Shattered. What happened was, if I haven’t been clear, I stepped on the scale and it crumpled into a blanket of tempered glass pieces. My feet didn’t get cut, thankfully, but the metaphorical slashes to my ego were no joke.

And then, after I took a moment to gather myself and DRY MY TEARS (and google the max weight of my particular scale and be relieved to learn I was still a few hundred pounds off..) I realized, hmmm… maybe I’ve been putting too much weight on my weight? [Read More]

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A Photastrophy!

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Totally Married Podcast

Episode 133

Elizabeth and Andy discuss his recent attempt to reconcile what’s going on in photos of him and whether or not he is as good looking as he thinks he is (he is says Elizabeth!) plus answers to listener questions about finding human contact and attention with someone when you aren’t looking for a serious relationship and are shy by nature, how to support a great boss who is newly pregnant, what to do for a husband who is incapable of using public restrooms, how to navigate getting rid of unwanted roommates who are also your friends, and how to move on from the hope of a relationship that never panned out the way it was supposed to? Enjoy!

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Jordan Bahat!

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Totally Laime Podcast

Episode 207

He’s a soon-to-be award-winning music video director extraordinaire – Director of Fun’s “Why Am I The One”, Grouplove’s “Tongue Tied”, and Meg Myers’ brand new “Desire” vid (check it out!), JORDAN BAHAT came on and discussed shooting his first booty vid, why his mom gave him a (maybe?) loaded gun at the age of 15,  and how a tan penis holds new meaning in his life after a trip to Spain. Enjoy!

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10 Things I’d Do If I Were Visiting LA


To quote 2Pac (am I allowed to do that?) “To Live and Die In LA/ That’s The Place To Be”… Well I certainly hope no one following this advice dies during a visit to LA, but I do think it can be the place to be if you want good food, good fun, and good times.

Following up on our discussion from this week’s Totally Married – “Heavy Breathing” wherein we (poorly) answered 2 listener emails about what we love to do in LA, I thought I’d offer a more comprehensive list. Keep in mind, we’re not “clubbers” (is that a thing anymore?) nor are we “hollywood types” in the traditional sense. We live in Silverlake so a lot of this is East-side centric, and we’re basically old farts in the bodies of 35 year old creative people. Point being, what I REALLY love to do in LA is curl up on my couch with my husband and animals and watch Parenthood. But sometimes ya gotta get out!

So… here goes – My list of things to do in LA if you’re visiting!

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A Great Birth w/Leonora Pitts!

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Totally Mommy Podcast

Episode 2

It’s our inaugural episode with a guest host! Today, Elizabeth’s friend ~ actress, director, writer and mother extraordinaire Leelee Pitts comes on and discusses her two unmedicated births, how kids somehow manage to poop up their backs, and how important balance is (whaaa?!). Then they answer a listener question about having a baby shower when it’s an adoption without knowing the exact date of baby’s arrival! Enjoy!